Howard’s inner thoughts

As she lay there dozing next to him, a voice inside his head kept saying, “Relax, you are not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients.

”But another voice kept reminding him, “Howard, you are a fuck’n veterinarian.”


Seashell tattoo

A blonde is showing off her new tattoo of a giant seashell on her inner thigh.

Thigh tattoo

Her friends ask her why she would get such a tattoo and in that location.

She responds ‘It’s really cool. If you put your left ear up against it,  You can smell the ocean.’

Thanks Gene

Lover almost killed by huge breasts

Huge breasts

British woman Claire Smedley almost killed her lover during sex – with her enormous breasts.

Mum-of-three Smedley, 27, who has 40LL breasts, panicked when she lifted them up while having sex and found that her lover Steven had stopped breathing.

In an exclusive video interview with the News of the World, she revealed how Steven usually loved being smothered by her breasts.

“This time, he started flailing around a bit but I assumed it was because he was so excited, so I kept going. A few minutes later I noticed he’d stopped moving,” she said.

By then, sales assistant Steven, also 27, was still and appeared to not be breathing.

“I was panicking and just about to call 999 when, thankfully, he started to come round.

“He was really woozy, like he was in a trance. Then he sort of coughed and sat up. I was so relieved,” the News of the World quoted Smedley as saying.

“I did think my time had come. I tried to slap her on her arm to get her to stop and get off me, but I think she misread the signals.

“The next thing I knew, she was sitting over me asking if I was all right. I must have blacked out. It was pretty hair-raising,” Steven said.

Smedley said: “After that he went off sex.”