Class quiz

A professor gives his physiology class a spot quiz. One question he asks is, “What part of the human anatomy expands to ten times its normal size during periods of intense emotion and excitement?”

He picks a rather overdressed girl in the front row to answer it. “Miss Callahan!”  The indicated girl, who heard the question, stammers with some embarrassment: “Professor, I’d rather not answer that question.

“The professor says, “That’s all right, Miss Callahan, you don’t need to answer it. Is there anyone present who can answer it?” He notes an interested face in the back of the classroom. “Mr. Hawkins!”

Hawkins says, “Yes, Professor, it is the pupil of the eye that expands to ten times its normal size during periods of emotion and excitement.”

The professor says, “That is correct, Mr. Hawkins.” Then he turns to Miss Callahan. He says, “Young lady, two things are obvious from your reaction to this question. One, you haven’t studied this week’s assignment; and Two, I’m afraid marriage is going to be a tremendous disappointment to you.

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Lotto ticket

One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring.

“Where did you get that ring?” her husband asks.

“Well, she replies, “My boss and I played the lotto and we won, so I bought it with my share of the winnings.”


A week later, his wife comes home with a long shiny fur coat.


Where did you get that coat?” her husband asks.

She replies “My boss and I played the lotto and we won again, so I bought it with my share of the winnings.”

Another week later, his wife comes home, driving a flaming red Ferrari, You guessed it: Her share of the lotto winnings…

That night, the wife asks her husband to run her a nice warm bath while she gets undressed. When she enters the bathroom, she finds that there is barely enough water in the bath to cover the bath plug.

“What’s this?” she asks her husband.

“Well,” he replies, “We don’t want to get your lotto ticket wet, do we?”

Thanks Gene

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