After an excitingly hot 69 position with his girlfriend, Infidel remembered he had a dentist appointment.
He was afraid that the dentist would smell pussy on his breath so he brushed his teeth 7 times, used dental floss 8 times & on top of that gargled 1 liter of Listerine.
As he arrived at the dentist he sucked 2 strong mints. His turn came up & the dentist told him to take a seat. Feeling confident & relaxed, Infidel opened his mouth wide. The dentist got close enough & said, “Man, did you have 69 before you came here”?
Infidel said, “Does my breath smell like pussy”?
The dentist replied, “No, your forehead smells like shit.”
No matter how much you shake or you dance the last drops always falls in your pants.
A divorced man meets his ex-wife’s new husband at a party.
Later, after knocking back a few drinks, he goes over to the new guy and asks him: ‘So… How do you like using second hand stuff?’
The new husband replies: ’It isn’t that bad. Past the first 2 inches it’s all brand new.’
…on a little red stool…. with a thousand people watching you….