Two old drunks are sitting in a bar when the first one says, “Ya ’know, when I was thirty and got an erection, I couldn’t bend it, even using both hands.”
“By the time I was forty, I could bend it about ten degrees, if I tried really hard.”
By the time I was fifty, I could bend it about forty five degrees, no problem.
“I’m gonna be sixty next week, and now I can bend it in half with just one hand.”
“So,” says the second drunk, “what’s your point?”
“Well, I’m just wondering how much stronger I’m gonna get!”
Last night we went to a party at our local senior center. The second Tuesday of every month they have an evening potluck supper. We usually eat, play bingo, reminisce, and drink a little wine and talk about the good ole days ….
We heard Selma Martin’s grandson is staying with her for a few weeks. It’s rumored he got in a scrap over some marijuana with the law out in Vancouver and he came to Edmonton to avoid the heat. Anyway, Selma is known for her delicious Brownies and she always bakes up a quadruple batch for each get-together. She makes enough for everyone and some for folks to take one home for later. For some reason they were extra good this week and every last one of them was eaten. Not a one left over. We later found out that Selma ‘s grandson, Butch, laced the brownies with some of his marijuana.
Knowing this, I guess it offers a logical reason for everyone feeling good that night By the time Zeke put on the bunny hop record, everyone was in a real good mood and it was the first time the whole place got up and danced …………..
That is until the cops came to check all the noise complaints.
YOU PUT YOUR LEFT FOOT IN AND … WELL YOU KNOW THE REST!
Life’s too Short …. Dance like No One is Watching You!
Why does a blonde wear panties?
To keep her ankles warm.
Which to choose…. decisions, decisions